Defend Yourself Against Negativity with Los Angeles Matchmakers

By Los Angeles Singles Dating Service
Home / Dating Advice / Defend Yourself Against Negativity with Los Angeles Matchmakers

Everyone knows someone who is always whining, complaining, and bringing everyone around them down.  If this rings home with you, our Los Angeles matchmakers want to help you deal with this draining situation, for once and for all.

There is nothing worse than having someone who sucks up all your energy.  Whether you’re dating someone who is negative or have friends who are always bringing you down, energy sucking vampires are the worst people to have in your life.  We’re sure you have someone in your life who is negative; after all, everyone has at least one of these people lingering around.

The thing about having a negative person in your life, besides the obvious attention seeking, is that they can transfer that negative energy onto you and turn you into a negative person as well.

A lot of negative people have no clue of the negative affect they have on others, which is why you must take the necessary steps to ensure they don’t drag you down with them.  It is not your job to make them feel better, so don’t worry about that.  Today, our Los Angeles matchmakers will teach you how to put an end to anyone who is sucking the life out of you and bringing you down.

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1. Tell yourself it will pass.

Unless you’re married to this person, remind yourself that being around them will only be temporary and that things will go back to normal when you get away from them.  For example, if you work with a negative person, tell yourself you’ll only have to see them until 5pm and that you’ll get to enjoy the rest of your evening without them harping by your side.  If you have a negative friend or have just started dating a negative person, don’t spend time with them or end the relationship before they drain the life out of you.

2. Hang out in a group setting.

Misery loves one-on-one company, so don’t give misery the opportunity.  If you do have to see this person, try to do in a group setting so their negative energy isn’t all directed towards you.

3. Refuse to give in.

Remember that you cannot fix this person and there is no point in getting sucked into all their problems.  Prevent things from getting heated by changing to topic of conversation.  For example, instead of listening to them complain about why they cannot find love, our Los Angeles matchmakers encourage you to switch the conversation to something lighter.

4. Offer to help.

While talking to this person, casually mention that you can tell they’re angry or upset about something and ask if there is something you can do to help them with the problem.  Just by showing you care about their feelings, you’re lessening the negativity.  But at the same time, don’t forget that you are not their psychologist.  Don’t get sucked into their problems, because at the end of the day, it’s their problem, not yours.  Lend an ear, lend some sound advice, and leave it at that.

5. Empathize with them.

Their negativity might not bother you too much if you put yourself in their shoes.  Remember that this negative person is negative because something bad happened to them.  Try to put yourself in their shoes for just a few minutes and see if you can empathize or lend some helpful advice.

6. Limit the time together.

If you can, limit the amount of time you spend with them.  Remember that the less time you spend with a negative person, the less energy they’ll take from you.

7. Talk about good things.

A simple way to get a negative person off a negative subject is bringing up positive things.  Who can get upset about babies, puppies, or kittens?  Stay away from depressing topics, like breakups, love, religion, or politics, as these topics are bound to get a negative person fuming.

8. Tell them how you feel.

If you have a friend who is constantly complaining that they have no luck in the dating world, claiming they always end up with jerks or that all the good ones are taken, give them your opinion and tell them how you feel.  Sit down with them and tell them that this negative attitude about love isn’t not going to help them meet a good guy or girl.  Tell them that a negative attitude will repel good candidates because no one wants to date a “Negative Nancy” or “Negative Ned.”

9. Tune them out.

There is only so much you can do, and if everything else fails, then you have to tune them out.  If you are in the company of a negative person and you don’t feel like dealing with their negativity and drama, simply zone them out.  If it’s only the two of you, tell them you’re busy.

10. Don’t be a doormat to them.

Don’t let them use you as the person they vent to, don’t give them that chance to unload all their negativity onto you, but most importantly, never let them take advantage of you.  You don’t want to become a doormat.  Don’t take them think you’re there to listen to their negativity any time they feel like unleashing.  You are your own person and you need to protect yourself too, and protecting yourself means staying far away from this negative person.

11. Get rid of them.

Getting rid of them means eliminating them from your life.  This is the best way to deal with a negative person.  Here at Los Angeles Singles Dating Service, we know a negative person doesn’t do anything for your life.  Trust us, your life will be so much better when you stop associating with this person.  Instead, we want you to surround yourself with happy people, the ones that bring out the best in you.  No matter how close you are to this person, there is no point in associating with them and letting them drain your energy and positive spirit.  It will be a repetitive a cycle, a cycle where you end up losing.  If it’s a family member or your partner, make sure you tell them how you feel so they can finally get help for their negativity.

If you’re not meeting the right partners on your own, contact our Los Angeles matchmakers today and let us introduce you to positive, successful, like-minded singles in LA.


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